Much of the last few months, my focus has been shifting away from traditional literary writing into explorations into older spiritual practices - older, meaning ones I explored and practiced in my late twenties and early thirties. It has meant tapping into my Catholic heritage and seeing if things like energy work/healing and meditation can work into my Catholic spiritual practice.
It's a shift that's found me rearranging pieces of my experience into new spaces. I've been startled to realize that things like Reiki can be part of being Catholic - I've come across quite a few Sisters who are Reiki and Tai Chi Masters, feminist women deeply rooted in social change whom I would like to meet and talk with one day.
It's something, though, I've found awkward to speak of here - this was supposed to be my writing journal and I've written very little, either here or elsewhere. In fact, I'm not really sure what shape my writing is going to take in 2006. It seems to be shifting from literature or even pop/Sci Fi to something more like scripts for presentations. A sort of teaching without a set, academic space.
I feel as if I am in a hallway, some doors shut, some doors open, some locked, some not. At each door, I hesitate wondering if the door is shut, should I try and open it? If it's locked, should I try to unlock it? If the door is open, should I walk in and stay, or how will I know I shouldn't just peek in, say hello, then move on?
I envy the focus and determination others have in knowing what they do well and their single minded pursuit of opening door after door to reach...not so much a goal, but an excellence in their art. I admire Olympic skaters, Cirque de Soliel acrobats, actors and performers with long careers, knowing their dedication to their art has made the practicing, falls, and even failures are part of the joy, beauty and complexity that is their continuing art.
Although I'm sure there is a common thread to all my explorations and expressions, the weaving is vast, and perhaps on the thin side. It can be hard for me to keep up with myself - this aggressive searching is sometimes just those two things - aggressive and searching - with little peace in between.
So, some interesting spaces I've been exploring:
Wise Choices is a blog by a Reiki Master who is currently hosting a 21 day Reiki retreat I'm involved in.
My wonderful cousin gave me a Force FX Replica Luke Skywalker EPI VI lightsaber for Christmas which lead me to an interesting set of searches on the Jedi leading to this article on the Jedi Faith . The author of the article sounds interesting too: Jon Sweeney is an author and editor living in Vermont. His new book is The Lure of the Saints: A Protestent experience of Catholic tradition.
Eventually I hope that this will all bend back to incorporate the FilAm and GBLT social justice/heritage issues I feel are also important, but it's difficult given my location. I'm hopeful, though, that the WSU FilAm women's conference scheduled for March (that I also hope to speak at) will provide me the linkage I feel is missing.